« I didn't forget about you, Jo »

Where did we leave our fearless hero?

Ah yes, he had just received an e-mail from his latest fan, "Jo." Jo attends the U. of Minnesota, and she says that porn is "a big time deal, doncha kno!"

It's been a couple days, so now I can start discussing this hate mail with a straight face.

People have told me what they thought. Many in the newsroom believe this person to be a porn starlet. People have noticed that it's "defense attorney" and not "defense lawyer." Nichole wanted to e-mail back Jo. Not gonna happen. Only I can do that.

I did e-mail her, but I forgot what I said. Basically I said it was a humor column, and I don't think I need to say much more.

And now for the rebuttal:

"Several of your comments were uneducated and degrading to those in the pornography industry." Several of their movies are degrading to their actresses, what's your point?

"There are many others who are laughing at you." I already knew that.

"Sex is as vital to our continued existence as eating and drinking and not something to be ashamed of." Now that you think about it, I don't think any one of us could live without mounting farm animals or having a three-way with Mexican car mechanics.

"Know what you are talking about b4 subjecting others to your rants" OK. I will try 2 do that.

"How is a career in pornography any different then one of an athlete or better still a defense lawyer? both are utilizing there skills to generate income." My second favorite line. A lawyer wears clothing. An athlete wears clothing with numbers on it. A lawyer doesn't ask the witness to testify under his desk, if you know what I mean. An athlete doesn't ejaculate on the opposing player.

"I'm no lesbian but i have experimented and often found some women are better in bed then men." I'm going to agree, and since we're different genders -- guess what? That makes you a lesbian.

Or at least bisexual.

And what are the odds that The Onion's latest issue includes a story about a young woman who overcame years of sexual abuse to become a megastar in the porn industry.
- posted by Suss @ 7:04 PM | Permanent Link To This Post