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I didn't make it up.

Sigma Phi Epsilon's BGSU chapter made t-shirts that said "If you like boys more... rush the house next door."

So the IFC made an example of Sig Ep (why isn't it Sig Phi?) by finding them in violation with their Greek constitution.

Basically, this means that people can't bash gays on t-shirts anymore. Such bashing will now be delegated to keggers, chapter meetings, rush parties, and beer blasts.

The chapter president of Sig Ep, Mr. Jonathon Brown, is becoming a bona fide politician. He said the t-shirts were meant to distinguish between being a boy and being a responsible, successful man. Jonny, you got my vote down the road.

"We were neglectful in what we did and now we have to deal with it in a manner like this," Brown said. "But also other organizations along the same lines have done things in the past or had the intentions of doing things that were not intended to be taken in the manner that it was."

How many times did you have to read that to understand what he was saying?

Oh, I see, so you're passing the buck of Greek mischief onto other chapters. Very mature.

Therefore, in a historic ruling, I still don't like Greek life.

What do they need to do?

1) Stop bragging about how many famous white people have gone through fraternities
2) Stop talking about how wonderful Greek life his -- how it parallels a religious experience
3) Develop a sense of humor about themselves. Letterman, Conan, Kilborn all make fun of fraternities, and movies like "Revenge of the Nerds" and "Animal House" perpetuate stereotypes, and these are staples in college movie nostalgia.
4) Crack down on underage drinking. I can't prove it, and I don't intend on exposing some deep dark secret, but if frats and sororities want to go above and beyond the typical college student, then they shouldn't stoop to the level that belongs to the average drunk and reckless losers.
5) Hold events that anybody can join, even independents. Make sure they are free, because I really don't want my money going to you. Some of my tuition already does, and I'm not sure how the money will be spent. For all I know, it goes straight to the Beer Run Fund.
6) Don't pretend that Greek life isn't a resume filler.

But if they did all these things, then they wouldn't be fraternities, now would they?

I have spoken.
- posted by Suss @ 12:40 AM | Permanent Link To This Post